Aug. 27, 2018

The most beautiful sound…

She wanted to join the party early!!

“You’re going to have your baby today,” said the doctor.

“No, I’m flying to LA today,” said The Mama-To-Be.

“Well, I can’t keep you from getting on the plane, but I cannot guarantee your baby will be alive when you land.”

“What?”  “What?”  Shock…Deep breath.  Tears.  More tears.  “Then I guess we should stay here.”

We went straight to the “birthing check-in place” (we were so new to this we didn’t even know what to call it) and checked in.  The wonderful nurses put me straight into a room and hooked me up to monitors.  Told the Daddy-To-Be to go get a quick bite to eat and bring in her “bag that was supposed to be going to LA” and then come back.  We won’t be going into surgery for a few hours.

The Mama-To-Be waits…and breathes…and cries.  And cries a bit more…

My thoughts were every which way…

“Oh…I need to book my mom a flight today…she needs to be here today.  I want my mom here TODAY.  I really want my mom here NOW.  But she’s in Iowa, she can’t be here now.  But I want her heeeeeeerrrrrrreeeeeee.”

More tears.

“Where is my husband?  Why isn’t he back yet?”

“I don’t want to do this…I’m not ready.  We’re not ready.  How can this be happening? Oh crap, I need to go cancel the LA flights. My god what is happening?”

The doctor strolls in and checks the monitors.  “Oh my…you’re going to have the baby right now.”

“NO, NO NO…where is my husband?”

I didn’t have my phone because you’re not supposed to bring your phone into the Maternal Fetal Medicine Doctor’s office because he doesn’t allow them.  And, I didn’t exactly know I was going to be having a freaking baby today.

“My gosh darn stinking husband should have been back by now.  What?  Did he go sit down at a freaking restaurant?”

I must have looked very ill because one of the amazing nurses let me borrow her cell phone which I promptly used to speed dial/stalk my husband for 15 minutes.  Dial, voice mail, hang up.  Dial, voice mail, hang up.  Dial, voice mail…”Where the hell are you?  They said I am having this baby now.  Where are you?  I need you…where are you?”  Tears followed by more tears.

Then, flip-flop.  Flip-flop.  Flip-flop.  “Oh thank you, thank you!!”  Those were the sounds I needed to hear.  My husband was casually walking down the hall…”Flip-flop, flip-flop.”  Little did he know the storm he was walking into.  

“Why haven’t you been answering your phone?”  Tears.  “We’re having the baby now!”   The answer…because you’re not supposed to have your phone on in the hospital or the doctor’s office…remember!!!  Ugh.

To make this long story, just a bit longer, they threw a gown at him, got me prepped for an emergency c-section, and away we went to have our baby.

No, no, no…that’s not how it happened at all…when I think back.  They brought in a pediatric surgical neurologist (or someone like that) who would be assisting with the delivery and warned us that our baby may look like a bird and that they truly had no idea how much she would weigh.  They didn’t know if she’d be breathing and all of these other horrible things you never want to hear before you have an emergency c-section to rescue your baby from your body.

All I knew was that this baby needed out and “it” needed out now.  (remember, I knew “it” was a girl but the doctors hadn’t ever confirmed this)

So, I’ll fast-forward a bit…there was a lot of talking, waiting, where’s my husband, waiting, waiting, epidural (ugh…that SO did not fit with my freaking birthing plan…heck, none of this fit my ideal, flowering, loving, energy-focused, essential oils, wonderful music, meditative, birthing plan).  Then, it all happened really fast…something happened, because the entire room went into ER mode…I think I almost passed out and finally my husband was holding my hand and 30 seconds later our daughter was out.

And, the most beautiful sound I ever heard was her cry…that beautiful, gorgeous, clear, cry.  She was alive.

She was out, she was breathing, and she was gorgeous.  And, she was little…but since we were expecting a baby bird, my husband said to me, “She’s huge.”  We still laugh about that…she was so stinking little.  2 pounds 1 ounce little…but she was our’s and her amazing self would change our life forever!!!

Love ya…

The Mama